Wednesday, 21 November 2012

The Last Days....

WELL!! Hasn't this been a fun journey!!
I am officially leaving my little, beautiful and cow infested home here in Matamata at 1am on Friday night!! Yup thats right! We like to do things the unconventional way :) it's gonna be legit!! driving up to Auckland in time for a 6am flight! FLIP I can't believe it.... I'm LEAVING!!!

I've had to take all of my pictures off the walls... put everything back into my suitcases and try and cram everything that I'm going to need for the next two months into a SMALL pack... bahaha packing is NOT my forte...

Although I'm super excited (and a tad SCARED) of what's up ahead for the next two months... I'm also super sad.... :( This is literally the last time we (This little YWAM family) will ever be living together.... I mean we do come back for a week together after outreach... but that will be more like a holiday then legit living together.... AND THEN after that.... who knows??! They're all going back to like Germany... and Canada... and the US... and The Netherlands... and other stupidly far away places like that!

Arrrg! It hit my the other day when I was looking around at everyone... I love them ALL so SO much!! aaaaaaarrrrh!! I have a feeling there are going to be a lot of tears happening at 1am on Friday night....

Cottage 5 is having a little party this evening... :) we're going to buy a lot of tasties and put all the mattresses on the floor in our room and have a little sleepover and dance party in our now foreign looking cottage...
I love those girls... Like actually! Hahaha they are all sooo funny :p we've had such good times!!
You know that you've got to the sister stage when you can pee comfortably  while still holding a conversation with the others who are still in the room... and I'm glad to say that we are at that stage hahaha!

Man... I'm in such a sentimental mood... I just want to go up to everyone and tell them how much I love them!! ARRG! Also I really need to shave my legs... but I think my razor is packed... AARRG!

It's hard...

But God is still ever so faithful....

And I know that I can totally trust Him with all of my relationships with everyone here! It's cool... He's just been bringing me back to the realization that He's my Daddy... He is and will continue to care for me! It's mot me going out to face to whole world by myself... No... He's holding my hand and will provide everything that I need for every situation! Thankyou God!!

We went star tipping the other night... Mwahahaha!! Most of you reading will have NO idea what this is... BUT YOU WAIT! Everyone who is with me while the stars are out will know what this is when I get back!!

Anyway.... Soooo When I'm overseas I'm not allowed to use my current email address... because I have previously sent emails containing lots of talking about YWAM and God and stuff... which is NOT allowed in the place that I'm going! Sooooo I've created a new email address to use while I'm over there... So flick me an email or a message on Facebook with your email if you want to keep in contact with me... because I won't be able to use this blog or Facebook either while I'm over there...

BUT!! It's really important that if you email me that you don't say anything about God, or missions or YWAM or Christianity or anything like that!! So all emails I sent have to be really vague and with lots of hidden meanings... and the same if you email me!

For exmaple... I could say something like... "I've had an awesome day hanging out with our Dad... He helped us catch a lot of fish!"

Rather than... " Lots of people were saved today and God's power was really moving through us!"

You get the drift... It's SUPER important coz it could put the people we'll be staying with in danger...

Yup... So I geuss this is goodbye for the next two months my stalkers.... I'll catch you later...!

Peace out.

Sunday, 18 November 2012

Weddings, Haircuts and Faith Weekends

Hello all....
I think I can honestly say that I am a very different person since I last wrote on this blog! even though it was only a few days ago.... SO MUCH HAS HAPPENED!

So... lets start with Friday....

Wow....
We had a 'tabernacle' day! We're basically we started at nine am and finished at like 11 pm... and went through the old testament tabernacle but in a new testament way... if that makes sense...
Basically this day was about completely getting rid of anything that comes before God in your life... It was a radical day of saying "God.... You can have ALL of me! Have your way in my life! I WILL go wherever, speak whatever and do whatever you want me too.... I will follow you wherever you go!"

It was incredible! We started off with a time a just praising God! and it was WILD! There is something amazing about 20 young people who are ALL madly in love with Jesus praising God with everything that is within them that is just amazing! We were all asked to bring things that we could praise God with.... it was saweet! and do you want to know the crazy thing??!!

Wait for it...

Like 3 people had a word from God that God wanted to recreate a wedding for me!! So Hannah D comes up to me and is like "Hannah! You are getting married right now!" Someone had brought a whole lot of flowers along and had decorated the cross with them at the center of the room, and someone had made a bouquet for me... I was just bawling!! Like seriously... WHAT??!! God... in all His perfectness has chosen ME to be His bride??!! It get's me every time!! So I walked down the aisle towards Jesus and just fell on my knees at the cross... There was nothing else I could do! Flip God is amazing!!

We also had this super powerful time of confession! Where we all basically completely laid out all of our sin for everyone to see.. and got rid of it! Lots of people gave stuff away or burned stuff... Anything that got in the way of God!! So yeah... there was a lot of laying stuff down for God...

One of the things that God has been laying on my heart for a while was my hair... if think in a lot of ways I hide behind my hair! and actually a lot of my identity was wrapped up in it! "Oh... Hannah! The girl with the beautiful long hair!" And every time I went to cut it, someone always talked me out of it... so in a way it was also a form of people pleasing I think... so yeah... and at first God kind of put cutting my hair of in my mind and the first thing that went through my mind was "NO... boys won't find my attractive if I have short hair!" Anyway... as soon as this thought went through my mind I knew that I had to cut it off! So... it took I while to actually convince myself but I did it! So did Steph and Elisa... we cut our ponytails off... and it felt SOOO freeing!! ARRRG!

Thankyou Jesus! So basically we spent the whole of Friday just worshiping God with everything in us! and declaring that we will be men and women of FAITH! It was sweet...

ANYWAY! So we get up on Saturday... and have  breakfast... and get put into teams... but not told what they are for... I get put with Steph and Jacob... which was AWWEESSSOOMME! then we get told to go and get warm clothes on, good walking shoes, a rain coat, and per team one bible, one camera and a pen. We were told NOT to bring: a bag... a phone... and ipod... ANY money of any kind... or anything like that....

So we go and get all this stuff together in total ignorance...hahaha.... Then we get told to pray as a team and hop into one of the three vans... So we do... and get handed a bag with a packet of uncooked pasta, 2 sanitary pads and a mysterious envelope inside!!

We are then driven to Rotarua and told to hope out of the van and open the envelope... then the van leaves...

Hahahahaha!! So me and Jacob and Steph get out of the van... and this is what the sheet of paper inside the envelope basically said...

"Welcome to Faith weekend!!
You've made all kinds of commitment to God yesterday and now it's time to put them into practice! Just be back at the base by 5.30 tomorrow, be open and have a great weekend!"

We just all crack up laughing.... for a long time!!

So here we are... in Rotarua with NO money... NO food.... NO shelter...NO transport aaaaannnd.... We've got to totally trust that God will provide!

aaaannnd he did!! To cut a long story short, we ran into a random but awesome church doing an outreach... and had the opportunity to lead a worship session in the middle of town! Then got invited into this awesome group of friends home for dinner... had another worship sesh... then got offered a place to sleep by this AWESOME couple! Who were just soooo hospitable! Then got given money for lunch the next day by this random guy at the church of the couple we stayed with!! Then got driven around town to go sight seeing with them! AND then... a guy even insisted on driving us all the way back to MATAMATA this afternoon!!

hahaha... we just spent the whole time being like "WHAT?! is this actually happening?!"

BUT basically... GOD PROVIDES!!! arrrrg... it was incredible....
annnd tbh I can't be bothered writing anymore right now coz I'm tired... :p

BUT I love you :)

Tuesday, 13 November 2012

FLIP flip FLIIIP

Hellllooooo my stalkers!
Sorry... that was a bizarre start to this blog entry... BUT this has been a bizarre week!! Last week was absolute madness!!
Firstly... WE GOT THE VISA's TO THE OUTREACH LOCATION THAT I"M NOT ALLOWED TO TALK ABOUT!! :D
I'm actually so stoked! Myyy goodness! It was a legit miracle how it happened... especially for Kyle... (who is American) and this means that generally they have a hard time getting visa's to the place we are going! BUT he got one! :D PRAISE GOD!!

THEN we had this thing that the boys did for us, then on Thursday we had a little base concert where all the music and worship students and staff performed their songs... AND THEN the weekend was spent at a recording studio in Hamilton recording our songs!! So the week was also very full of practicing and writing and singing and stuff!!
My song is called "Not my Love Song"... basically because it's not my love song! I went to try and write a love song to God that expressed how much he means to me, but I couldn't find the words to express it... and then God kind of gave me the revelation that he's singing over me! and that's totally His merciful and gracious love!

Here are the lyrics:
I just want to write You a love song that conveys
Just how much You mean to me
But  I can't find the words to say

Then something incredible occurs
That in my mess I don't deserve
The God who died for me
Could sing a song of love over me

CHORUS:
"You are my princess
All beautiful you are to me
You are my bride
Come away, come away with me"

What is this love so faithful in spite of me
There's only one thing left for me to do
I kneel before You my King

Then something incredible occurs
As I'm kissing the feet of the one who set me free
The God who died for me
Would gladly choose to say to me

CHORUS

And there's nothing I can give that's worth anything to You
Yet You exchange these ashes for Your beauty
Yeah, there's nothing I can give that's worth anything to You
Yet You exchange these ashes for Your beauty

And the God who died for me
Would gladly sing to me...

CHORUS

And THAT is basically the whole song! Just imagine a little bit of guitar in there... some beautiful box drum percussion played by the spectacular Jacob! Aaaannnd some ravishing violin played be the incredible Elisa and you have it!!

So Yeah... through all the hectic-ness of last week, God was still revealing Himself to me in His beautiful loving nature !

Basically he was telling me stuff about my identity in Him.... and about the plans that He has for me and the journey that we've got together... God is so good! haha and knows me SOOO well... He actually took me on a walk! Showing me this little river walk that I've never noticed before.. God told me to go on this walk... So I did! Some of the part were so beautiful! Some where muddy (and I was wearing Marit's shoes... DANG it!) and there was one interesting part where I thought I was going to fall off the bank into the river!! But I got to the end and came into this beautiful field with long grass and this spectacular sunshine shining golden  through the trees! I felt God say to me (super clearly!) This is what your journey with me is going to look like! There will be parts where God is so evident and beautiful! and parts where you legitimately question whether you are doing the will of God (muddy!) and some parts that are just down right scary!! But God told me that in the end it will be beautiful! and that He will be with me all along the road! to TRUST Him!!

So yeah... that was awesome! Myyyy goodness... And other stuff like that!!

BUT THIS WEEK... myy word!! God has been convicting me like crazy! We have Mark Parker speaking on the Lordship of Christ and God is mooovvviinng! Today... Matt K had a picture for me of a hedgehog... it was in ball and birds were trying to peck at it, and it was going tighter and tighter into this ball... Then God said "Open up and reveal the underside" So the hedgehog rolled over and revealed it's soft unprotected belly and the birds were about to try and attack it, but then the power of God came and just destroyed the birds...

It sounds kind of weird... but this picture had me in tears....

This is basically what God is doing in me at the moment... I feel like there is all this stuff on the inside of me that I don't let people see... Sin and fears and attitudes which I'm so scared that people will judge me for and that I'll be hurt or destroyed or stomped to the ground if I show... But God is challenging me... bit by bit... to lay myself down... to be vulnerable and completely open even if that person (which it is!!) is totally broken and scared and so NOT perfect!

So yeah.. God is in the process of bringing things into my heart which I would normally keep to myself and getting me to confess them publicly... Which is actually the most humbling thing! And means that these walls are in the process of crumbling down! Thankyou Lord! I want to be in absolute and complete surrender to God... All my rights and entitlements and will and everything! That is basically what this week is about... which is a mixture of scary and ... BRING IT ON GOD!!

We leave for outreach in ten days......
AAHHH!
What??!!
WHAT!!!??
I still don't even have all of my fees!!
the time is going way too fast!

The pity is... is that while I'm overseas I'm not allowed to update this blog where I'm going, so It will appear that I've disappeared off the face of the earth for a couple of months.... Sorry.

But that's not for another ten days... so lets just enjoy this time together :)

Peace out




Wednesday, 7 November 2012

The boys...

OH MY GOODNESS!! Well... there has been a lot of stuff going on for me this week.... which I will definitely talk about at a later date! BUT FIRST! I must tell you all about this evening *sigh* while it's fresh in my memory... it was beautiful...

So... two weeks ago, we (the girls) became increasingly aware of some secret collaboration going on between the guys.... and all of us (at some point) got handed a beautiful personalized invite to a dinner... on the 7th of November, with the instructions to dress up fancy.... needless to say we were flattered... yet extremely curious... but no matter how much we pressed them for information, we got nothing...

Anyway... The 7th of November is today... and us girls spent the afternoon curling hair, swapping clothes and doing each others make-up while the boys were mysteriously absent!

Anyway... this is how this evening panned out.... at 5.30 we get a knock on our cottage door... and a very spiffy Rich is standing outside! "Good evening ladies! Your taxi service has arrived!" He then escorts us to the van and drives us the 30 second trip to the A-frame...
We get there and there is a line of dashing boys all dressed up with shirts and pants and ties and stuff.. who help us out of the car and escort us to our seats!!

Flip!! The whole lecture room was filled with candle lit tables.... flowers and each girl had a named seat with a block of chocolate! and there was live music and...Gaaah!

Anyway... so we get a whole evening of being serenaded too with beautiful songs such a One D, songs in French and dutch... and also original's... such as "Woman"... a song by Brent... probably a highlight for me! HILARIOUS! we also got waited on by all of them all evening! with fizzy.. and a beautiful chicken and pasta dish.. and ice-cream sundae's, and coffee... we had poem's said to us, and even a Fijian haka performed for us! we all felt so loved...

It was all so beautiful... they're all such gentlemen!...

*sigh* and THEN they set up a photo booth so we got some good pics, and pushed the tables back and had a DANCE PARTY! which was sweet :)

AND TO FINISH.... we had the last dance... and we all slow danced... it was so sweet :) I got to dance with Van :) it was lovely! he's like my little bro... :)

AND we even got escorted... like PROPERLY escorted back to our cottages! Me and Hannah got escorted by Matt :) it was also lovely!

We all felt so special... like princess! naw... I love them ALL so much! they actually put so much effort in to it! my heart was actually melting... gaaah....

beeeaaauuutttiiifffuuulll......

Catch you laterrrs
 

Saturday, 3 November 2012

In a cafe in Taupo

So... as the name would suggest I am at this moment sitting at a cafe in Taupo!! and have ordered a vanilla latte... my second coffee for the day and it's not lunch time yet! Darn this coffee addiction...

Well it's free weekend this weekend :) and what a weekend it's been! Me and five other lovely ladies decided it would be a fabulous idea to rent a car and just go and chill for a weekend in a tent by lake Taupo and just have a lovely relaxing weekend.... sunbathing by the lake and having a glorious time!

So yesterday, with Marit at the wheel, Steph, Elisa, Rebekka, Hannah and I piled into our rented family van and set sail for TAUPO!! Ha! It's funny how plans change.... :p

So this is basically how our weekend has panned out so far.... we arrive at le campsite and it is pouring with rain and there is a severe southerly blowing... hahaha! we all just cracked up laughing.... soooo in the midst of this we in a big hurry begin to set up the two tents that we rented from the OP shed... only to discover that  one of them didn't have a fly! .... HA! more laughter.... as the guy that showed us our tent site and who was waiting patiently for us to sort ourselves out so that we can pay him, gives us that "Wow... you are all obviously completely insane... but harmless so I'll just look at you sympathetically" look....

So to cut a long story short, we spent a nice  day browsing the shops in Taupo yesterday... had a lovely date with Rebekka... AND THEN with Hannah :) it was lovely!!

AND Marit, Elisa and Rebekka slept in the van!

 THANKGOODNESS for people movers.... that is something I never thought I'd say... but I have a new found appreciation for those things... they have a lot of inner beauty...

We also listened to a LOT of T-Swizzle.

Then this morning we a woke to the beautiful glaze of sunshine streaming into the tent... and the sound of lake taupo licking it's shores... mmmm BEAUTIFUL!! I love God's creation! AND do you want to know something completely profound??!! He created it for US! WHAT?!
Hannah and myself had a revelation of this yesterday as we looked out across the lake with the sun breaking through the clouds and sparkling on the blue.. BLUE water... Man... and as Hannah said "SO much better then a bunch of roses"
I had tears running down my cheeks... AGAIN! I don't think I've ever cried as much as I do... ALL THE TIME at Dts...

Anyway... after a lovely breakfast I am now sitting in a cafe... about to go and meet up with the others again... and we're gonna go SWIMMING!! maybe... We'll see! :P

God's about to start doing something crazy in me again... I can feel it... he's starting to highlight even more areas in my life which he's got to sort out... I am so BROKEN! it's crazy... But allll good! God's got it!

I'll tell you more about this at another date! God bless!

Thursday, 1 November 2012

Horses

Heya!!
Sooo what else has been going on?? WELL this week is about RELATIONSHIPS! woooohhh! aaaalll types of relationships! Family, Friendships etc .....AND good old Rooommmaaannntttiiiiccc ones! ooo lala!

Haha na it's actually really good! I've learnt so much already... flip it's awesome!! We have Josh Cole speaking with us again.. but this time his wife, Misty is speaking too! They are super amazing :)

God (through Johanna) gave me a beautiful flower the other day.... right after I had laid down all of my pride and judgementalness... and asked him to show me how to love others truely! it's funny how he does that! Come and sweep me off my feet with his love when I lay down control once again.... He also said to me "I love you, and I will teach you how to love"

Thankyou Jesus! I love you... falling more and more in love with you everyday!!

mmmmmm!

What else has been crackalacking??!!
Well! yesterday I had a lovely evening! There was a light party at a local church which most of the YWAM fam too... a few of us however, stayed back! So...after helping to cook up a beautiful roast (AND THEN EATING IT!!) it was amazing..... I went into the recording studio to try and record some of my songs and brought Matt with me because I am terrible with anything technological things! aaaannnd then it didn't work! So me and Matt wrote a song about singing instead! then Van joined us and we went on a walk to see the four beautiful horses nearby!! Welll... first we went to nearby shop and brought some ice cream and then we walked HALFWAY to the horses and then walked back because it was getting dark... and talked about the difference between Canadian and New Zealish words... I said Van had bum fluff on his chin and they both cracked up laughing... Apparently.... this is a phrase only truely appreciated in New Zealand...

I love my cottage! they are brilliant!! Marit got a maassiivvee box of german chocolate and she's been sharing with me... I love her! and Steph.... we always seem to end up talking about poo or gas! we have a funny joke about how she is like saturn... full of gas! Ha! it's funny :)

I also had a short but brilliant date with Hannah today :) I love her! I love our Hannah squared dates! I can't find the button on my laptop for the actual squared symbol, being the technophobe that I am, but if I could I would have used it! Last week we went swimming at the hot pools :) it was BEAUTIFUL!

We also had our second outreach prep meeting today :) drama with the visa's! So if you could pray for that, that would be brilliant! BUT I have no doubt that we are going so God will provide :) hahahaha we also had a veerryyy funny game of the whole 'write a phrase, then the next person has to draw that phrase, and then the next person has to write what they see in the picture and soo on...' it was verrryyy funny :) I love my team! Maybe I'll do a team profile next time??!! we'll see...

Oh yeah... I also walked into a pole today and broke my sunglasses... so if you could pray for healing for my glasses that would be appreciated.
I'm kidding... about the healing thing.
Not the walking into a pole thing.
That actually happened!

Anyway... Catch you laterrrr!